North Station Sports

 

As sports fans, we all have our favorite commentators. Like a symphony accompanying a dramatic movie scene, the guys who tell us who’s dribbling the ball and who should recieve the pass, equally contribute to the overall drama of the sports moment being witnessed.

Conversely, like a catchy movie soundtrack can be totally ruined by a disastrous music video (Ghost Busters theme comes to mind – wow, that was bad!), an inappropriate comment by a Talking Head, searching for a catchy sound bite, can ruin an amazing sports moment.

In this week’s edition of NSS: One on One, we delve into the best and worst of the NBA sideline team’s.

We want your opinion…

 

Nick:

My best of Talking Heads is pretty straight forward and may not shock anyone. I have been pretty adamant about who I love and who I hate in the broadcast world.

I have been watching the NBA for over 20 years and the NBA sideline crew has always been as important to me as the guys in the starting line-up. When I first started to follow the NBA in 1987, you never saw more then two guys in the broadcast booth.

Back in those days, Turner was broadcasting the NBA on TBS with a bias towards the Atlanta Hawks. The iconic Skip Carey was joined by the horrendously arrogant Rick Barry. When the playoffs would arrive, Doug Neal would often take the play by play and Doug Collins would (thank-god) replace Barry. Doug was a shoe in to join the broadcast team as his Bulls were elliminated year after year in the first round by the dominant Celtics. As much as I loved to watch the Celtics sweep the Bulls back then, it was all the more sweet when I realized, in doing so, Collins would elliminate Barry from the TBS team after the Bulls bowed out.

Rick Barry will occasionally guest appear on the NBA on TNT and other various NBA talk shows. His arrogant analysis has not changed with age and neither has his hair – this guy has the WORST die job in the NBA Alumni Association. Rick, you’re nearly 70 years old! It’s time to let your hair catch up to your age…

Anyway, in 1987, CBS had the network rights to the NBA. Dick Stockton or Brent Musberger would have the call. Quintessential Celtics homer, Tommy Heinsohn, would have the color call. In an era I loved, Tommy would clearly be rooting for the Celtics to beat up on the Lakers. As a Celtics fan, I loved Heinsohn’s biased bravado on CBS. The “Tommy Point” always went to a guy in green and the Celtics never committed a foul.

Though my love for the home team broadcaster is unquestioned, I felt it was best if I stayed away from this issue. I felt it best I don’t put the “Tommy Gun” in my Best Talking Headslist as I now realize how annoying a “homer” could be from listening to, ESPN broadcaster, Mike Breen clearly hate every team not based in New York.  I will keep my praise and haze to the national scene.

My Top Three Talking Heads:

This list is in no particular order. These are the guys I keep my fingers crossed to hear when the opening intro is played on national telecasts…

Ideal Broadcast Team:

 

 

#1 – Doug Collins:

Doug is a far better analyst for basketball then his record shows him to be a coach. Doug is concise, articulate and (most times) accurate. He often refers back to the history of the game in an appropriate manner that is relevant to the on-court action. When Doug is in the booth, their is not much fooling around or ball busting, this guy keeps it serious but never lacks for the dramatic interpretation of the great play without sounding silly. Aspiring ball players or coaches can learn a hell of a lot listening to Collins.

Noteworthy:

The only downside to Collins’ analysis is his habit of not speaking into the mic. He speaks so softly that I often have to have the audio so loud that my neighbors can hear the action. It can be very distracting when the audio is unbalanced because Collins is whispering and his partner is speaking directly into the mic.

 

 

#2 – Hubie Brown:

My broadcast preferences always seem to sway towards the more serious presentation of the game. Though the occasional torture inflicted upon the play by play guy by the color analyst is amusing, you won’t find any with Hubey. His style is coaching with a microphone. Hubey gives the coaches perspective as much (if not more) as the players. It’s interesting to watch the game with a coaches view point in mind. Brown knows when the time out should be called, when the subs should be made, when the use of an intentional techniqual is appropriate and he never fails to mention it. Another observation worth mentioning is Hubey’s nature to, like a true coach, root for the underdog. He does it in a nature that is not obnoiscious. It often seems to sway his microphone motivation away from my Celtics but, even when Hubes is against my squad, I don’t seem to mind it.  Often touted as the Hall of Fame coach, it’s worth noting that Brown is the only basketball figure I ever saw showing off his ABA bling - having never won an NBA championship.

  

Noteworthy:

Back in the 70′s, Hubie resembled more like a game show host then an NBA coach. Thank-God Hubey changed his hair style! Is anyone old enough to remember Brown’s grey perm back in the early 90′s? Scary stuff! It’s hard to believe, Hubey will turn 77 (years old) in a few weeks.

 

#3 – Reggie Miller:

I can’t say anything negative about Reggie. He is tough on the players. He holds the players on the high standard of work ethic and intensity that he demonstrated during his playing days. I love when Reggie challenges a player to a shooting competition on national television. Truth be told, Reggie could still out shoot most players in the league. Reggie is a ball buster too and when he tortures Marv or the Czar, it sounds appropriate and not forced. The guys wit is as quick as his release when shooting. His combination of fundamental breakdowns, holding players accountable and subtle comic relief make for a pleasurable experience.

  

Noteworthy:

Reggie needs to take the marbles out of his mouth. Sometimes he, like Collins, is hard to understand.

 

 

 

 

#4 Cheryl Miller:

A member of the Basketball Hall of Fame and Women’s Basketball Hall of Fame, Cheryl is respected by the players, coaches and her peers. She combines a sharp wit with the questions we want answered. She also busts on her kid brother (Reggie) in subtle jabs which is quite funny.

Who’s NOT on the Sidelines:

Craig Sager:

Sager has been around forever. He is the clown of sports. His colorfully disgusting wardrobe selections are distracting. He is one of those guys who seems to be well liked by the players but doesn’t carry much weight in the sporting world. This guy (and his shoes) can stay off my tube.

Marv Albert:

Though Marv has provided some of the greatest play by play of the last four decades, his toupe and pantie-gate  scandal overshadow his great broadcast career. Today, Albert’s forced sodomy chargesand fascination with wearing women’s panties are never mentioned, however, the disgusting allegations still exist and leave me with a creepy impression of him. That in itself is enough for Albert to stay away from my Celtics.

 

Kevin Harlen:

Harlan is my best of the worst. He is an exciting and compelling play by play guy. I never get sick of Harlan declaring a key jumper by an NBA player as a “dagger”.  I was, however, very disappointed with his sound bite, “no regard for human life”in reference to LeBron’s dunk over KG in the 2008 playoffs. Okay, LeBron’s dunk was unbelievable and forceful but that sound bite is overplayed, too over the top and makes absolutely no sense. What does “no regard for human life” mean anyway? How does it apply to basketball? It’s better suited for an alien invasion. It’s dumb and it, alone, knocked Kevin off my list. Call it unfair but… Harlan gave me a dagger to the heart when he hunted for the sound bite. That’s a big no-no in my book. Sorry Kev. 

Mark Jackson:

The ultimate sound bite hunter, this guy is SObad! He has no right being anywhere near a microphone. Jackson irritates me so much that I sometimes have to mute the television and put on the ESPN’s radio broadcast and listen along there. Can some one tell me who’s doing the hiring at ESPN/ABC? I never met anyone who thought this guy was credible or tolerable. His use of the word “outstanding” in pursuit of the lasting sound bite is so misplaced in the context of the play he is describing. Mark Jackson is anything but oustanding. Mark brings down the entire ESPN crew, which is already average, at best. 

ESPN,  PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, get rid of this guy!

In Closing…

So there it is, my ideal and not so ideal NBA broadcast team’s. Note – there is no play by play guy in my ideal team. None of the current field of play by play guys deserve to make this list. Sorry.

 

Matt:

 

Who is in…
 
(I didn’t strictly limit myself to the play by play and color man, I went into the studio as well)
 
…The Booth:

  

 
#1 - Marv Albert: 

Say what you will about the man. He is a freak. Wasn’t the trannie supposed to look like Lawrence Taylor? But the guy is legendary in the booth. “Yes!…and it counts”  His voice is synonymous with NBA basketball. And he is great with a partner. He knows when to get out of the way. 
 
 

  

 

#2 - Jeff Van Gundy:

The best part of JVG is his honesty. I really get the feeling that he is laying it all on the line. Not holding back. He is extremely knowledgeable, very funny, and has that New York sensibility that I like. I love when he was an ankle biter in the Heat series back in 1998.

 

 

 

#3 - Hubie Brown:

To me, no one departs more knowledge than Hubie. I feel like he has been around forever. He offers such great analysis I often find myself either nodding my head or arguing with him in my living room. He is the epitome of the “coach perspective”.

 

…The Studio:

 

#1 – Ernie Johnson:

No one is better at steering the ship when the “entertainment” starts getting off the tracks. He has a great radio voice. He is funny enough not to be awkward around funnier guys (Barkley) but not too funny where he needs to be the focal point. He’s great with the on-the-go highlights too.

 
#2 - Jalen Rose:

I am huge Fab Five guy (they changed the game) but more important he is the best of all the recent players. He is smart, funny, and insightful. He takes the job, but not himself, seriously. I really dig the cadence of his voice.

 
#3 - Sir Charles Barkley:

Are you kidding me? I love Chuckles. I would move to Alabama to vote for him for Governor. I watched his golf lessons show on the Golf network. His swing is insane. I don’t really care whether Charles even breaks down teams or plays or anything. I just want him on TV saying funny stuff. That being said, he is very good at breaking down games and has the street cred and the balls to call out players, coaches, teams, officials, and anyone else who needs it. He is a very important voice in the NBA right now. He is a force for good.

Who is OUT…

Craig Sager

I hate clowns. And nothing is worse than an unfunny clown. I can appreciate self deprecation, but those suits are a whole different level. He is the Charles Nelson Reilly of the NBA.

Mark Jackson

This guy is a downer. His voice is tiresome and maybe even a little bitter. I don’t ever feel entertained or enlightened by what he says and can’t wait for him to go away.

Stuart Scott

Super annoying and thinks he is way, way, way cooler than he actually is. He hasn’t earned any analytical cred in my mind. I actually like him when tones the shtick down to an 11.

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